Friday, September 17, 2010

Friday entry: Subway talkers

A strange thing happens when you read a book on the subway. Even if everything about your appearance and demeanor indicates that you shun social interaction, people feel compelled to approach you. It's inexplicable to me that someone engaged in a solitary activity seems enticing. You are not a cat, so please don't misinterpret a book in my hands as an invitation. Is there a reason you feel entitled to sit your fat, furry, metaphorical ass on the page I'm reading?

Possibly the only thing more obnoxious than being talked to on the subway

I have never once wondered whether I had anything in common with other passengers, but I'm routinely approached by fellow improvisers. Okay, for one thing I don't care about your life. For another, I'd rather not know exactly how extensive my competition to be on a UCB team is. I also resent having to lie about a "boyfriend" to make it very clear that "missed connections" don't exist and you will never not ever find love in this city. But also, thanks for trapping me in a pointless conversation so that it will take me even longer to finish this fucking book, trapping me in an endless cycle of weirds wanting to analyze the inanities of "The Game."

It's getting to the point where I'm going to have to buy a copy of Girl with the Dragon Tattoo just to blend. Thanks a lot, assholes.

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